I sit here thinking about all the things that have compiled to this very moment.
We forget about all of the things that have become second nature to us. Like breathing, walking, talking, using the bathroom, etc, these things become trivial things until it's no longer a thing we can do alone or with out duress.
Sitting up has been my most painful feat, minus the attempts to number 2 all day.
If I push will the stitches rip and all my insides come tumbling down like Jack and Jill, and their precious water.
I have to explain my tears and tears are from trying to shit.
This is less than an ideal situation.
I could approach it like I just need to play 57 games of Sudoku; that putting my mind to an ultimate mind-numbing activity will coerce my body to oblige with my every wish.
I could use the Ole birthing techniques; inhale, exhale and push. That would surely end in my pulling something that I could not simply push back into place.
No, no it must be a mixture of both.
A distraction from my own pain companied by my own infliction and limitations.
Wish me luck.